Handling disappointment with an attitude of Recovery

HI all it is Hunter.

My dream job interview went great the first day and I was asked to return on the second day. On that day I met with just one person who told me that I was not the right person for the job but that she liked me and would like to see me working at the organization coming in at a lower level. She told me that she has seen the other resumes for the position and that I am one of the weaker candidates. Then she suggested I should write to the hiring authority and ask about other opportunities or I would probably end up with no job at all there.

I thought about this, discussed it with a few trusted advisers, and decided why not. SO I did as suggested and I was basically told thanks for your honesty but we have no such opportunities...I was screwed! I am ideal for the job I interviewed for and can hit the ground running and have all the required skills..I am pissed off that I tipped my hand, on someones advice too soon and baffled.

I went back to the person who suggested I take this approach and asked her if she had any other advice. Her response was weird she said "you will be an asset in your new position. That is your fortune cookie." I have no idea what to make of this.

I am thinking about contacting HR and discussing this as it borders on unprofessional and some of my friends have suggested that the person I met has someone else in mind for the job. I really don't know what to do as I really do not want to slam the door shut.

SO I am processing my feelings over the weekend and praying for clarity and will figure out my next course of action on Monday. Do I call HR, do I call the woman who suggested I take this tact...I have no idea. But what I do know is that I have to let it go and move on....

I am not sure what the lesson is here...maybe it is to not react so quickly and to take time to reflect..maybe I should have not written that email to the hiring authority until the process was over...I might have landed the job, and i might not have....It might have been more appropriate to write it after I was rejected..But I was told I would be rejected for the position and that this woul be a good way to keep the door open...Very confusing indeed.

So, Mark is not working and I make very little money. I needed this job to take care of my family. My sponsor says Mark should work and that I am enabling him by allowing him not to. She is right. But she has never lived with an recovering alcoholic. Recovery is different from active addiction. Mark is doing all the right things and everyday he is getting better. He knows he needs to work and no amount of nagging will make him work any sooner. All I can do is focus on me.

I know that if Mark was not sober and if I was alone going through my work situation I would fall apart completely. Mark and our son are all I have and I am lucky to have this.

I am burned out from the job search process and baffled by this recent experience. I have been so rejected recently that I feel like a completely undesirable loser. I feel like many women have advanced degrees and more experience than me and with more of them in the workforce my opportunities are limited...AM I destined to be a glorified telemarketer for the remainder of my career? It is killing me..But I must move forward.

The weather is horrible today so I have made it a PJ day for me. I stayed in bed until noon and read a great novel, Mark gave me a 20 minute foot rub (which I love), I made lunch for my family, did some work and blogging on the computer and when I finish this I will send Mark and my son to his baseball game and I will do some aerobics and yoga. I will then come for the last few innings of the game. Today i am being good to me.

As for the situation with my interview. I am processing it, writing about it, talking about it to people I know, and praying for guidance. I am not reacting, I have already done enough of that, and I am praying,. I pray I can reopen the door and I am praying for guidance and strength.
I am NOT falling apart and not immediately reacting. I am processing and thinking things through...That is what the peace and serenity of recovery helps us to do....

Please keep me in your prayers...