Hi from Hunter. Quick post for today. I am going to find a real estate broker and list the house this week. It is killing me. But truth is that I can not afford it and house is in foreclosure. Our programs of recovery teach us to act. So act I must do. I will not put up a for sale sign as I would pass out coming home to that each night and don't want do deal with neighbors gossip. Pray I must do as well. Perhaps I will get a new job and be able to keep the house. Perhaps a surprise windfall will come our way...Perhaps we will win the lottery, etc....But for today this house is a luxury I no longer can afford and I am the only one who is currently working.....I am sick to my stomach.
Mark has been active today in moving forward, he has gotten teh car out of our driveway to a garage for sale-car has been sitting there for a year and has bad memories. He borrowed a lawnmower and will mow the overgrown lawn today....
I guess to move on I have to get rid of..I am sick of getting rid of..I am sick of having to move and I am sick of losing everything all the time...I am sick of no stablity and I am sick of chaos.
Mark has also just threatened me that he will no longer blog if I talk about this stuff in the blog..So I am not responsible for what mark does or does not do..But I am responsible for blogging how I feel and my recovery.
Today I must act and not react and do the next right thing...TOday that is very hard.
Until later.
Hunter
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5 comments:
Sounds like things are really rough right now! I wish you the best and I will be sending positive thoughts!
- Nicki
prayers coming your way... and maybe y'all might need to have seprate blogs.... that are not read by one another. I am a firm believer in having even if it's only a little) space away from ym spouse for room to breath and share a little... But, that's just for me...
God bless and good luck!
oh, and Hunter, is no one has suggested it... try Al-Anon... and well if someone has already suggested it... try Al-Anon...
my wife and I are both in AA and I did some Al-Anon for awhile and it helped me with some things...
Thank you Nicki. Also Scott-I have been in Alanon for over 2 years it is a wonderful program and there is no way I would be in the mind set I am today without it. Separate blogs is a good idea but defeats the purpose of this blog which is to share both our thoughts and feelings as we recover as a family. I pray it works.
oh and thank you too Scott. Love the comments and prayers sent by all.
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